Skip to main content

Social Call with a Newborn?


Let’s be honest - there’s nothing quite like the excitement of brand new baby rolling into town. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or neighbor who has added a new tiny human to their home, you may be waiting on the edge of your seat to meet the new babe. Before you go running to get your share of baby snuggles, there are a few unspoken rules you should keep in mind when it comes to visiting a newborn and we’re going to break those down for you today.
  • - First of all - when exactly is it okay to come knocking on their door? Ask when it would be a convenient time for them and never come over unannounced. 
  • - Definitely come with a practical gift in tow - you can never go wrong with food for a busy new family! Maybe pick up some fruit or something else fresh as they’re probably relying on the freezer for most of their meals.
  • - Always lend a helping hand during your visit. Offer to take care of those dishes in the sink or throw in a load of laundry or even just to wipe down the counters - it will be much appreciated! Consider some one-handed snacks for mama!
  • - Don’t take pictures of the baby or post them on social media unless you get permission from the parents. They may not have had a chance to share pictures themselves or just may not be comfortable with having their baby’s face on the internet, and that’s okay!
  • - Don’t push the new mama to talk about her birth experience. She may have had a traumatic experience that she’s not ready to talk about yet, and hormones and exhaustion can make talking about the birth even more upsetting. However, if she does want to talk, be prepared to be a great listener!
  • - If there’s an older sibling around, make sure to give them some love too! All the attention on a newborn can be upsetting to the new big brother or sister and they’ll really appreciate a bit of the spotlight on them. 
  • - Most importantly, do NOT step foot near that house if you are sick or have been recently! Newborns are so susceptible to bugs and the last thing the tired family needs is a sick baby! Even if you’re not sick at the moment, make sure to wash your hands often during your visit, and although it’s hard, avoid giving baby kisses! On this note, leave your kids at home - the presence of more children in the house can be overwhelming for the new parents, not to mention all the germs that come along with them.
  • - Finally, don’t overstay your welcome - the new family is exhausted and is probably trying to stick to whatever bit of a routine they manage to put together. Keep the visit short and sweet while reminding the new parents that you’re only a phone call away if they’re ever in need. 
These are our general guidelines for newborn visits.  But if you are reading this in the present- 2020 has thrown us some whoppers.  We urge you to be especially cautious around newborn babies and their families.  Please respect boundaries if families are not welcoming to visitors at this time.  In these unprecedented times parents are left making choices their parents, grandparents- heck even most of their friends have not had to make with a newborn baby.  Give new parents grace! Ask them how you can support them right now. Ask them how they are doing. 

Some ideas for socially distant support in 2020:
  • - Porch or door front meal drop offs/meal trains that encourage parents to leave a cooler outside or with a defined drop off time from parents where they know they can easily get to the door and get food inside. 
  • - Gift cards to a local restaurant or delivery app for easy food/coffee/meal delivery. (Hello! A $5 Starbucks gift card sent in app MADE MY DAY Postpartum - it doesn't need to be big! Just thoughtful and practical.)
  • - Sending or dropping off older siblings craft kits, activity boxes, etc. that show them a little love and may give mom and dad a break to relax
  • - Offering to pick up groceries if the family is avoiding shopping trips/just because!
  • - Checking in! It can seem so small, but loneliness amongst postpartum parents is high generally speaking, never mind right now when isolation is more of the norm. Send a sweet text, a voice message, a funny video- let mom/dad know you are on their mind and there if they need something!
If a family is willing to have you in their home or at their home, please make sure to respect their comfort levels. This may mean a visit outside, with masks, or other extra precautions that bring them peace of mind.  Remember, this is not personal or about you, it is just a new family trying to make sense of the world their baby has entered and keep them as safe as they can!

Mama-to-be? Check out our blog post on why you may want to say 'no' to your visitors, here!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Do Inductions Really Rise Around the Holidays?

Do Inductions Really Rise Around the Holidays? As long as I can remember in my doula career, I have been told, both seriously and sarcastically, that inductions rise around the holidays because doctors want to control the births they will have to deliver on..let’s say Thanksgiving day or Christmas Day.  I have to be honest in that I never really paid much attention to it because our team typically takes off the end of the year! It has been an intentional decision in years past to not take births in the months of December and January. This provided us with the time to disconnect, visit family and friends, and wrap up one year + dive into the next with a solid foundation. As you well know, 2020 has changed so much of what we knew and, for us, this meant not having the space to disconnect without leaving birthing people vulnerable in a global crisis and not traveling for this holidays. With this, we decided to work straight through 2020 into the start of 2021. And in this moment, the enti

Is your IUD poisoning you?

Could your copper IUD being causing your body to be overloaded and in need of a serious detox? (This is also a podcast episode on The Tranquility Tribe podcast, if you prefer, listen  here .) Hey Tranquility Tribe! This week, we’re getting educated about a little-known, big problem that affects thousands of women around the world: copper toxicity. HeHe has had a copper IUD for about a year and loves it, but when she started experiencing some funky symptoms, she came across the topic of copper toxicity and knew she needed to do a deeper dive. There’s no one better to educate us about this than someone who has experienced it themselves, so HeHe enlisted the help of Kirby Costa Campos, who has made it her life’s mission to educate herself and others about copper toxicity and help women face the reality that the copper IUD may be playing a big role in occurrences of this poisoning.  Kirby had been ill on and off for many years and

Failed Inductions: What You Need to Know

Failed Inductions: What You Need to Know When we talk about inductions, we often speak of them like they are 100% guaranteeing us a baby at the end. While this is true most of the time, you’d probably be surprised to learn that indcutins can fail and you may be sent home to wait it out a bit longer. Or, if the option isn’t presented to you, you can ask or take yourself home. It is important to ensure that you and your baby are safe to go home.There are thousands of women each year that experience a failed induction and it can be very hard emotionally.  What is a failed induction? A failed induction is the inability to reach active labor while being induced . There is a certain process we want to take when it comes to induction. I call this your ‘individual induction equation.’ It’s truly individual to you and you get to introduce various induction methods as you see fit which makes your equation unique to you. First we want to ripen the cervix--it needs to be soft. You have options of